Scars are scars.
There is no need to justify that we hurt, we just do. Asking ourselves why we hurt… that’s a deeper question for another time. Sure life may look easier for some on the outside, but on the inside no one is a stranger to pain.
None of us will pass through life untouched, unhurt, or without a few scars (some bigger and deeper than others).
Emotional scars are made in all kinds of ways.
Most of mine came from self-defeating limiting agreements I made at the moment of impactful life changing events - just to be accountable. When I told myself “well I’m never going to let that happen again”, or “from now on this is the way it’s going to be”. Sorry to say but these were not positive affirmations, these were merely walls and defense mechanisms. I was wrapping my scars with a torn t-shirt, hoping no one discovers them....ever.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for my toughness. I wouldn't be on this earth without it. I still found a way to survive and to become the most functional member of my immediate family. I apologize if I sound like I’m making excuses. I am grateful for my life and at the same I am NOT where I thought I would be at age 42. It would be hard to convince me that my emotional wounds didn't play some part in my self-destructive tendencies. Despite carrying bags of bricks around for most of my adult life, I've managed to still climb a few mountains, and help a few people along the way. I've let my past (namely my shadow) ruin perfectly good relationships and great opportunities with good people. For what? Ultimately only to lead me back into old cycles so I could make the same mistakes, pick up some new scars, and maybe inflict a few new ones on others in the process. This is a reality. AND it doesn't have to be my reality, not anymore.
That might be how my story has gone in the past, but it doesn't have to continue or end this way. I and I alone get to delete those “old templates” and create new ones, from a new space.
It begins with recognizing that they happened, and taking accountability where it gets to be taken. All the while letting go of what isn’t mine, and forgiving others from operating from there scars, just like I did. We all have a shadow.
Mirror’s are a bitch.
Acceptance isn’t always easy, but it sure does speed up the process.
Accountability isn’t easy either, but it’s an empowered way to take on the dark shit we don’t want to see.
Forgiveness helps us clear the energy and release whatever is no longer serving us. Thats how we put the bricks down.
Taking time, having the patience to heal and nurse our wounds allows us to move out of the past into the now.
Surrender gives us a new chance at life and allows the Universe to take us where we need to go. Especially since trying to control everything apparently doesn’t work any more.
Empowerment gives us the courage we need to create a new space so that we may rise again, but this time wiser and more humble than the previous version of ourselves. When we master it, the universe pats us on the back and says “good job mortal, ready for round 17?” . And before we can even answer it thrusts us into the next portal for more lessons.
But luckily, we are resilient. ------------------------------------------------
The process described above is alchemy.
Some people are under the impression that alchemy is exclusive to lead metal, gold metal being used in conjunction with the philosophers stone and is performed only within the confines of a laboratory, but there’s more to it than that. This philosophy (the stone) can be applied in many ways and this formula can be applied to many experiments.
Life events are just that, events. It's our opinion, judgment and response to events that define them as "good" or "bad". How we respond to those events produce the elements needed for the process - lead and gold. Life is an experiment and you my friend, are the laboratory in which it happens. As much as we would love to make gold without the lead, in Alchemy, it's an energy exchange, we can't have one without the other. We are free to carry lead (pain) as long as we like. There's nothing stopping us from doing so, it's a free country. But there is an incentive to transmute it sooner than later. Because when we learn to convert that lead - that pain, into gold - knowledge then we become richer for it. Not to mention it awakens something within us some of us didn't know we had. We start to recognize and develop a power that was once available only to the masters wisdom and knowledge that came before us. People that have also experienced pain and had their own scars, but used their experiences to extract some of the most important messages man kind has ever heard, natural born Alchemists.
Scars will happen, hurting is inevitable, but benefitting from it…is optional. The choice is yours.
- Love Zo